Thursday, February 6, 2014

Go-To-Gay: Valentine's Day Wishes!

Introduction by Melissa Amster

I've been a fan of Valentine's Day ever since we got to bring our foil and heart sticker covered shoe boxes to school and then take them home filled with little cards, lollipops, and conversation hearts.

I still loved it throughout my dateless years of high school, as my parents would give me gifts and chocolate that day. I would even bring Valentine's cards for all my friends.

When I was in college, I got to experience Valentine's Day as part of a couple. However, I sometimes felt like I put too much pressure on that day and it was sometimes an indicator of where things were going in the future of those relationships.

As an adult, I still love Valentine's Day, but I mostly celebrate it by volunteering at my kids' classroom parties and picking out goodies for their friends at Dollar Tree and Target. My husband and I don't do all that much in terms of celebrating it as a couple. This year, it falls on Shabbat so the chances of going on a date aren't in the "cards." I do enjoy purchasing or making cards for him though. We definitely celebrated it as a couple before we had kids. I think I should take our co-Go-To-Gay's advice and find a way to do something special, even if it's not necessarily going out on a date.

In regards to this month's topic, Gary is talking about the ways we should love ourselves over at his blog.

What is Love?
By Gary Edwards

I looked for love or the fantasy of love for years. I knocked on a lot of doors and kissed a lot of toads. I wanted love the idea of love and what I thought was love. The kind of love you read about and see in movies. I forced myself to be in relationships that were not the right fit so I would not be alone. I ended up feeling even more alone because I was giving and not receiving. What I learned falling in love is a fantasy. Falling in love is like falling down, too often we get hurt. I have been in a relationship now for a little over 17 years and I have grown in love. This is the most solid relationship I have ever had and at the core it starts with friendship, honesty and respect, which leads to a passionate relationship that has some staying power. We have grown old and love each others flaws and all. Most of all we listen to each other and care.

So this Valentine’s Day if you find yourself single, don’t force yourself on a date you don’t want to be on. Take some time for you, nurture yourself and make a list of what you need and deserve in both life and a relationship. Start living your life and fill your mind with a positive attitude and like will attract like.

A Valentine's Day cake I made for Wade
If you are in a relationship, honor that relationship. Remember why and how it came to be. For one evening forget you are a Mom, Employee, Caretaker and anything else that is a distraction and love your special someone. Have fun, be silly and let you be you that connected yourself to your partner in the first place. Love you partner and let down your inhabitation. Clear your mind and tap into your inner Diva!

What’s your best and worst Valentine’s Day Memory? If you don’t have a best at the moment maybe Cupid will shoot his arrow your way and 2014 will be your year!


Gary Edwards is the marketing and events manager for bestselling author Wade Rouse. Edwards arranges Rouse’s tour schedule, speaking engagements as well as coordinates and facilitates his writing workshops and retreats.  Additionally, Edwards has helped market and promote all five of Rouse’s books. Edwards also has a background in hospitality, and sales as well as design. 

With his vast professional back and a love to listen and help friends he is a perfect storm of love and nurture. Edwards is Martha Stewart meets Dear Abby with a dash of Mrs. Doubtfire.  For more, please friend him on Facebook and Twitter.


Connie said...

My memoir would say: I did things my own way.

Janine said...

Twice a year, I cook a really nice dinner for my husband. that means I buy everything (instead of putting it on the list and making him buy it) and actually spend good time in the kitchen. We went out in the beginning of our relationship, but over the years, we've gotten where we don't like to deal with the crowds. And, take out brought an entirely different perspective a couple years ago when we tried and everything got messed up. I used to love the day when I was younger, but when I started dating, my first boyfriend was one of those who dropped you right before birthdays (My birthday and Valentine's Day are 3 days apart so that meant I didn't see him for usually a week) or Christmas. When I was with my ex, we experienced some bad luck Valentine's Days. it wasn't anything either of us had done, just other things like a dog getting attacked the same year and the attacking dog cornered me at the house. That same morning when i was going to work, a nest of bag worms busted in our tree and I was showered with worms when I walked out the door (I've had a fear of them ever since). it's just weird mishaps that happen over the years that make me think it's a cursed holiday for me. I would love to go back to the time when I was little and we passed out little cards to everyone in the classroom. Life was simpler then and we weren't pressured to impress anyone with gifts.